Nah coz, this is bullshit.
I'm currently listening to the score that features in Disney's The Little Mermaid. It is such a beautiful piece of music - but it's the perfect example of the way in which Mr. Walt Disney gassed us up while we were kids, and still (arguably) continues to do so. I tried to figure out the best way in which I could write this blog, and figured featuring screenshots from various films with an attached explanation would best do the job. So without any further ado, LEGGO.
Take a close look at the following pictures, if you will:
What the hell is this, please? Two flamin' mutts sat at a table eating spaghetti and meatballs, complete with breadsticks and an old vintage glass bottle as candle. What's more, they are sharing a single string of spag. I'm sorry, what? For a young girl like me, a candlelit flippin' dinner is hard to bloody well come by, not to mention the sharing food aspect of things. When I was a wee bairn, this is exactly how I wanted my first kiss to be. And yes, I truly believed this is how it would happen. Little did I know that the only place romance such as this lives is in Disneyland. Needless to say, my first kiss was not at all like this. It took place on a dusty brick wall at the end of my road. Far from blissful. I'm not sure why these pooches are living the high life, while I'm existing just in between the faint lines of luke-warm reverie.
Beauty and the Beast definitely remains one of my favourite disney films of all time. The message is beautiful. Instilling the idea of beauty being 'in the eye of the beholder' into us at the early age is a very good look - but when it comes down to the crunch - who is falling in love with a monstrosity? Coz it ain't me mate. Also, who's to say a 'beast' will always have a nice heart? His traits could end up being as hideous as his mug, and boy - I am not about to take that chance.
Now we all wish that some day we'll find that perfect man who will sweep us off our feet, and carry us into the sunset on his horse, right? I like to think that too. I like to think that I will be one of those lucky girls who will find a guy whom is perfect for her. But the sad truth is, not all women do find their prince. In fact, a lot of women don't even find a flamin' pauper; and these women are all beautiful, intelligent, and graceful women, but still they get left on the laundry line. And if they're left out there too long, they may get ruined. And if they're ruined, what's the point. She wasn't good for you then, so she's not gonna be good for you now. "Some day my Prince will come" she says. Yeah, well good for you, Snow White. Good for bloody you.
I think we could all do with a fairy godmother. To design and make our custom-made outfits for our dates, especially for our men. Can you imagine how easy it would be? And then we'll get in our carriage (made from a pumpkin of course, duh!) and it'll take us to the ball, where we'll find our Prince Charming, dance the night away, and it will be as if we were the only two people in the room...
No. Because your Prince rahtid Charming is a freshie, the music playing is that everlasting Afrobeat noise and you'd be damned if you entertain any type of hope that this freshie has of getting your number. And hold tight my guy managing to find you on facebook, sending you God-forsaken pokes. That's his equivalent of tracking you down using the lost glass slipper init. 10 for effort, but lose the slipper. That only works for Disney.
Now I know I've ranted on for a while, and it's all sounding a bit cynical, but there is one disney film, which I believe breaks the tradition of 'unrealistic expectation of love'...
These screen shots show the last few moments of Disney's Pocahontas. If you've seen this, you know that this film defies the rules of 'happily ever after', as in in the end, Pocahontas does not end up running way in the sunset with her beau. Pocahontas is my favourite Disney film, and it is probably because of the fact that it is the most true to life. Pocahontas being a Native American and John Smith, a white Englishman, their racial differences served as an obstacle in the film. This is something that is still so present in our society now. Pocahontas fought for justice and for the life of her man, but despite all this, still was not able to be with the man she loved. She chose her family over him, and so many women nowadays make this same decision. The famous lines of John Smith read: "I'd rather die tomorrow, than live 100 years without knowing you."POWERFUL.
I truly believe that this statement is the shit. Although, Pocahontas and John Smith were not able to be together, nothing is more beautiful than experiencing love, first hand. Of course, life-long marriages are ideal, and fairytale weddings are a dream, but unfortunately at times, it doesn't last. But at the very least, you've had a taste of what love is. Maybe sometimes, one has to be content with just that.
